run run run

Until I collide with myself, I will continue to run run run through life as though they were no walls, no barriers. With this type of reckless abandon I will conquer the fear that inhibits myself. Until the inevitable day when I run so fast I am blinded to the world around me, until my sight is blurred by wind and my eyes begin to tear. But that moment is far way, I sense, and until then, running with the breeze in my hair allows me to feel the world around me, uninhibited and free from self doubt, worry, trouble. All those things that pester a normal life will not phase me, no. I run run run with reckless abandon, sweat pouring down my back until I drown in it- that sea of salt that engulfs me.

Randoms Thoughts from the Girl Behind the Curtain

Kill my body so as to kill my mind

Why can't it ever be that simple? Complications lead me to misinterpret emotions. Then I'm fucked. I need to be more than good at something. I need to be great at something. What else is the point?

My life is one big incident of bad timing and mistaken identity. A Shakespearean comedy on broadway.

I'm more mad at myself than anyone else...still...

Passenger Pidgeon

Nothing is more real or stereotypically beautiful than a person at their worst...because when we are at our worst, we are the most honest and true versions of ourselves...we are a clean palette that awaits only improvement...nothing else.

I'm still anxiously awaiting a heroic effort or a drug that makes me aware, not ugly.

Some of the favorite photos I re-discovered from last summer...

My friend Nirvana

Oh me, Oh my

What more can I say after two weekends of too much fun - the cause of all my confusion becomes apparent now. Perhaps if I didn't enjoy myself so selfishly and constantly these worries would not overcome me. Even still I wonder if every moment I become less intelligent, articulate, interesting.
But then...
I almost feel more myself now than I ever have. I am raw and human and passionate. It's as though the indecision in my life has faded into the background and I only bother with the present - the only thing that really exists. Thoughts form distinctly in my mind accompanied by images and flowing movement. Is this not how one express oneself?
And so...
It is only by our outward actions and communication that we can make any significant difference in the world. Everyday interactions can destroy your mood just as easily as they can enhance it. Why not put positive messages on your tongue and speak happiness through your lips? Why strike out in fear and anger when you can make someone's day with a simple smile? So I wonder if we really are so selfish as to think that our views should be infringed on others...I wonder if we really are so egocentric to punish the innocent for our mistakes?

who am I?

I have been ten different people

at ten different times

telling ten different lies

My opinion letter to The Herald

I can only hope this article and the ones that follow create awareness of the ever present complexities of homelessness. Too often I hear people dismiss homelessness as a choice or even a punishment-as though those who are forced onto the street by addiction, mental illness, or financial instability deserve their lifestyle. This attitude demonstrates unprecedented ignorance and is simply a convenient excuse for inaction. Homelessness is and will continue to be a problem until we collectively acknowledge that those who live on the streets are people too-people who deserve to be cared and loved just like those of us who are fortunate enough to live a life free of mental illness, addiction, and financial troubles. Until we learn not to blame the homeless for their situation, we will be unable to progress towards positive change.